How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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