Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

So you there Red?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

Whats white and all over my room? paint

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

20

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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