A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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SNAPPLE!

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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