If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

20

A baby seal walks into a club...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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