they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

Justin Bieber

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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