How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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