What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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