Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

Women's Rights.

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

You

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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