What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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It's not just me bomber, Kane Aodhan and kevin are all posting stuff too so SBB!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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call of duty world at war

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops