If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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