What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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