A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

A homeless man comes home from work.

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

How are you this morning?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

Miley Cyrus.

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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