When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

Har har hey

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

sexual intercourse.

did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

Yes.

What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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