*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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You

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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I'm hungry.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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