A baby seal walks into a club.

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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?"what's up" "A preposition"

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Dont look at me.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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You copy and paster!

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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