What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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banana

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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