What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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69

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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A man walking on a beach looks into the surf and sees a beautiful oil lamp floating to shore. Wondering who in the heck uses oil lamps anymore, he picks it up, sees a bit of crust on the side, and rubs it clean. Just then a burst of smoke comes out of the lamp, and a genie floats out and stands before the man. "Oh master, thank you for releasing me from the lamp. In thanks, I grant to you one wish. Anything you ask for, it will be true," said the genie. "One wish? What happened to three," asked the man. "Dude, don't push it. We're in a recession. So what's your wish?" "OK. OK. I ... I... I WISH I WAS RICH!" screamed the man. The genie folded his arms, blinked twice, scratched his nose, nodded his head, and spun in a circle twice. "And it is SO!" he cried out. The man looked at himself, looked at the genie, but nothing seemed to have changed. "WTF, genie. Am I rich?" The genie replied, "Well no. You said, 'I wish I was rich.' I made you rich... ten years ago. You were rich. Now you're not. You used the indicative mood 'was.' If you wanted it to become true now in the present, you should have used the subjunctive mood 'were.'"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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