What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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1,984

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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Dont look at me.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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