April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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Why is your face? Because.

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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A man walking on a beach looks into the surf and sees a beautiful oil lamp floating to shore. Wondering who in the heck uses oil lamps anymore, he picks it up, sees a bit of crust on the side, and rubs it clean. Just then a burst of smoke comes out of the lamp, and a genie floats out and stands before the man. "Oh master, thank you for releasing me from the lamp. In thanks, I grant to you one wish. Anything you ask for, it will be true," said the genie. "One wish? What happened to three," asked the man. "Dude, don't push it. We're in a recession. So what's your wish?" "OK. OK. I ... I... I WISH I WAS RICH!" screamed the man. The genie folded his arms, blinked twice, scratched his nose, nodded his head, and spun in a circle twice. "And it is SO!" he cried out. The man looked at himself, looked at the genie, but nothing seemed to have changed. "WTF, genie. Am I rich?" The genie replied, "Well no. You said, 'I wish I was rich.' I made you rich... ten years ago. You were rich. Now you're not. You used the indicative mood 'was.' If you wanted it to become true now in the present, you should have used the subjunctive mood 'were.'"

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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1,984

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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