Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's dead? Your mum.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops