Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

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i dislike sack in my mouth

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

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fabien

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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