Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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