whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

thumb_up thumb_down +54

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

thumb_up thumb_down +46

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

you know what hurts.... PAIN

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

thumb_up thumb_down +44

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Black Veil Brides.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Nah

thumb_up thumb_down +38

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops