The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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"Up to 50% off."

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Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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