Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

Dick spice

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

stop it ryan vallee

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

A jew go out of a bar

an amosh person used an electrical appliance

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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