Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

thumb_up thumb_down +37

There's no "i" in tim.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your social life

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

thumb_up thumb_down +29

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

thumb_up thumb_down +29

oh hiya come in

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops