If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

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Hi Shelby!!

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Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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Well, I have to go eat again "Axel Knight". See you around soon enough, just give me a call if you want me around... Hopefully I find a fucking telescope so I can read the code on the chip thingie... Damn I am hungry. See you around sugartits.

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Vagina-Boob

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

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gdfhtrfcgsexdfchrthgdfggfhtdtfhdtyfgfdfcghfgdyghhyrtfgrdfdffdtgdfgfghrthfg Alzheimer's.

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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