Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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Canada

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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The Treatment of Steve Bartman

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Nah

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Black Veil Brides.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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