How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

Pickles

stop it ryan vallee

A jew go out of a bar

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Guess what? No.

What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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