Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

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A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

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What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

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Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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