There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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The horse said "nay."

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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