Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The 19th Amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down

A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

thumb_up thumb_down

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Gabe Mercado

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walked into a bar, he was extremely short sighted, after this occurence he decided to phone up the opticians to get some glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down -4

i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops