Nobody cares.

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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What abou three times

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

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oh hiya come in

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops