What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

save water shower with friends

2

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

I have no ideas.

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

George Bush.

How do u shit With ur ass

Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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