- Anti Joke

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

No it isn't.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

A Haiku Haiku's are easy But Sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

The 19th Amendment

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.