What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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