ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

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Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

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whats better than 24................. 25

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Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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Can you see this brett? Connor

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Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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