OBAMA

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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Sandusky went from Penn State, to the State Penn.

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How much is an abortion? A life

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Who spends too much time on Anti-Joke? ...

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What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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i dislike sack in my mouth

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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