why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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How did the man rape the woman? With his penis.

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Knock knock Who's there My dick

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What is worse than getting the wrong haircut at a hair salon? A terrible shooting at your local Chuck-E-Cheese

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What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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my computer crashed because i never quit... out of anything

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What happens when Brittany Spears is hungry? She goes to taco bell for food

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Your mother is so ugly, because she was badly beaten.

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What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Want to hear it again?

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Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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