Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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I have no ideas.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why was Michelle crying? I don't know. Neither do I.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

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this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

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Unflushed Shit...

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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