Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the computer crash? Because the driver transporting the computer to his friend lost control of his vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I'm going to Re-write History... History

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops