Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Nobody cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What abou three times

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

thumb_up thumb_down +35

And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops