2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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Penis-Pump

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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