as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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