Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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whats really hot the sun

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hi

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Blarg

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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What do you call a orange striped zebra? No not a tiger stupid its a orange striped zebra duh!

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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