Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

The Charlotte bobcats.

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

Why did the child die? Natural causes.

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

2

Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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