Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

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Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Thumbs down if you like this anti-joke!

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One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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Why did the computer crash? Because the driver transporting the computer to his friend lost control of his vehicle.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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