What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

blind man walks into a . . . .. .

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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