How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Women's rights

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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