Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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roses are refds violet are xaflj;k it sucks having turretts syndroewe

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Canadians

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So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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fish fishy caoimhin

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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