Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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