A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

thumb_up thumb_down -24

"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Two trees sit in a dark forest. Between them is a small hare. The wind blows hard and rustles the trees. The hare then looks up, and then forward. He hops away.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops