How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

the economy.

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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