How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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ask me if im a door yes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

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I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops