Knock knock.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

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whats disappointing and not funny? this joke. ouch.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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Dwight Howard

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The New York Giants

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

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Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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A miserable man committed suicide.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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