How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Anyone can post anything.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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