how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Immigration Laws

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

An orphan falls off a cliff.

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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