What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

Donald Trump.

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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