What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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A fat guy!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops