A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

American: Hi im American Hispanic: Oh hey

What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...