Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops