Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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Roses are red.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

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What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops