A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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civil rights

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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Balls

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A woman walks into a bar.

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How do you teach an asian baby to read? Enroll him in a good pre-school and practice regularly.

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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