Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

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If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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