What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

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Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

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How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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Q.What Did the Little Kid Say To Cancer In The Hospital? A.Nothing. He Died From Cancer 3 Minutes Ago.

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What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What's the difference between contemporary Christian music?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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