Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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