Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

Detroit has a low crime rate

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Dislike if you are a prostitute

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

women's rights

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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