A priest was walking home from church one day when he found a young boy crouching naked in the bushes. The priest contacted local law enforcement authorities on his cell phone and proceeded home once they arrived.

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what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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Stop me if you heard this one before.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

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Fat people

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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