What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

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roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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