Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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João Duarte reads this.

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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What is my name? I dont know

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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