Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

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the holocaust

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

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Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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ekoj

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What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

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Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

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What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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