What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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Chuck Norris will inevitably pass away sometime in the future.

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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