What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? we will never know he never opened it

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

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How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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