What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

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Halo < COD

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Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

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What is worse than torture? Not much.

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Q: What do you call a black man running for congress? A: Congressional Candidate

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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A: Knock, Knock B: Whos there? A: Noone, the door and the visitor are both existential figments of your imagination.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Why was there a red chicken? He tried crossing the road.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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