How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

My dad

What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

hrih

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

A special needs student walks into a girls change room, and is then escorted out unaware that what he did was socially unacceptable.

What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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