A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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What do you call an unfunny comment that demeans a group of people? Bigotry

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I used to be an adventurer like you but then i grew old and i never took i single injury unlike my brother he took an arrow to the knee or so he says i asked him to show me and he was all defensive like "whoa man i don't need to prove anything." so i think he's lieing

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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There are two cows standing in a wide, green field eating hay. The first cow says: "Moo". The second cows says: "Thats funny, I was about to say that."

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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