Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

Me Neither.

Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

How do you treat people that cannot say no in just two seconds? (redux and spellchecked) Treatment: Hi...: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! SAY IT MUAHAHAHA! People: NO PLEASE I CANT! NOOOOOO! *door unlocks* Problem solved, NEXT!

What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

How many cows say moo? All of them

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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