Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

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women's rights.

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

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Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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