Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

Joay impistato is a fig

Reading books

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

What did the loser say to the winner? Good game

what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

9/11/01 walks into a bar

What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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