Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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