How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

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What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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