Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

Wanna know something funny? Your face

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

autistic kids rock

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

Y' can't spell rape without ape.

You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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