Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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A man walks into a bar. Except it was a metal bar, like a pole. So he got hurt.

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Your mother is so fat that her body takes up more space than the average woman.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender goes to get him a drink, but then realizes how ridiculous this is and wakes up from his dream. He rolls over to tell his wife about it, but she ignores him. He begins to cry silently, realizing his marriage is in shambles.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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I will create more jobs for americans

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Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and there wasn't a sufficient wheelchair ramp at his access.

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Ain't idn't a word.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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