What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I have to tell you something. What? I just told you something.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops