What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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what do you call a black man driving a police car? a cop

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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your face

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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if life thows you lemons ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

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Woman rights.

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What word starts with a P and ends with an ORN?.......Popcorn sickos!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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