Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is black, white, and red all over? The Wall

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An 8 year old, a 9 year old, and jerry sandusky walk into a shower...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

guess what chicken butt

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

thumb_up thumb_down -14

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How does shit taste?\ Good.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops