Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

meatspin.fr

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

thumb_up thumb_down

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +10

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +188

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops