Knock, Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

thumb_up thumb_down -169

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

thumb_up thumb_down

Who killed Lincoln Nobody knows

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

thumb_up thumb_down -65

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black guy with a job? Responsible.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

4 men walk into a bar. They have fun. ~Yasmin~

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -114

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops