What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

What happened when the dog was was let out to chase the rabbit? It caught the rabbit and killed it.

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

guess what what ...

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

What did one llama say to the other llama when they were on vacation? I filled our luggage with orphan meat because i'm building a meat dragon and not just any meat will do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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