why is the earth mad at the moon? cause the moon mooned the earth

what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

Here's another:

There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

Pen15

How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...