What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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what do trees and humans have in common? they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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So 3 Jews walk into a bar, I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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What do you call a Black man with AIDS? Unfortunate.

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Yo' momma's so black, I hope she didn't experience any racism growing up in school.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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A farmer has 17 sheep standing in a field and all but 9 drop down and die. How many sheep are left? It doesn't matter. A CIA sniper guns the farmer down, along with his family and the remaining sheep. The other agents move in and remove all evidence that the government is experimenting with a new nerve agent.

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Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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British Dentistry

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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