A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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Hey, Have you Seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he!

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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