what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

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Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

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What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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A priest, rabbi, and a monk are sitting on a plane. One is in first class, one is in business class, and one is in coach. It turns out they're all going to the same interfaith conference.

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If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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