Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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K

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 magnum and murdered her violently.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

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what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

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What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

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Give me thumbs up!

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

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He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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Dislike this, and I kill myself.

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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