What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

Neither did she.

http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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666

i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

Try this on someone... go up and say "Ive got a great knock knock joke for you but you have to start" there response "Ok, knock knock" you say "Who's there?" They are usually dumbfounded and a hilarious awkward silence ensues

kkkk

Why was the black person promptly escorted out of the bar? He was under 21.

What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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