A ghost walks into a bar. Nobody sees it because it is a supernatural entity.

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What came first?....the woman or the sandwich

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It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

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Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Roses are grey, Violets are black, I have Alzheimer's, Barthtub.

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

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385

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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doctor: hey u ready to get home person: yea doctor: that sucks cause u have cancer

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A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

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why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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