Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

What kind of blue is not heavy? Light blue.

why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

An Asian person drove home safely.

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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