-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

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why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Your mama's so fat she can't have children.

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alex h is such a ginger, that her hair downstairs is red.

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biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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What do you call a black person with white legs ? Ashy

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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Bitch! Love, J.B.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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