Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

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Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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Are you Jewish? No. That's what Anne Frank said, too.

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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6

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What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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