why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? Because the Joker was raping Robin too hard!

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Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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What's red and sticky A DEAD BABY

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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