A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

How do you fit an elephant inside your car? Starve it to death then chop it in pieces.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

There once was a man from Nantucket.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

Stephen Hawking raped your mom

heyy emit chase wazzup

Your Mom is so fat... Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

Dave and Tim walk into a bar. The bartender says to Dave: "What'll it be?" Dave is black.

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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