What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

A platypus walks into a bar. They are the only mammals with the ability to lay an egg.

Why was young Ferdinand sad? He had a very rough day. In the morning he woke up. To find a man in his room, and then the man raped him. Then, Ferdinand found out that his whole family was killed by an angry rat. Then, he realized his grandma took away all his Christmas presents and ate them. Then, the angry rat showed up and brutally murdered Ferdinand and ate him. The rat then burped up Ferdinand and his family's bones, and on Ferdinand's bone there was something wrong, indicating that Ferdinand had cancer and would've died the next day anyway. The rat then got cancer from Ferdinand, and it died. That is why Ferdinand was sad.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

whats the difference between and black guy and a bench? a bench can supoort a family

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

Hi

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...