Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken go up the car? To get a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

thumb_up thumb_down -3

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops