What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

thumb_up thumb_down

What did God say to the crying man? God doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2,039

There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, It is also the material Aodhan's house is made from.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How does the black, high school kid get his new clothes, IPod and nikes? By working at his family-owned convenient store with his father and grandfather every night after school, but not until his homework is done.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +3,547

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

thumb_up thumb_down +3,011

Come on children, don't dawdle.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +3,277

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops