Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

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What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

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Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy A: Blue fuzz

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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