Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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mark is religion

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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K.

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why did the man die? he got shot

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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