What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

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Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Q What happened to the kid with diabetis and a one legged mom A. He got hit by a bus

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Your mom is so hot your daddy married her and they lived happily ever after

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops