A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +169

This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

why did the blue berry cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the black person die? Of old age

thumb_up thumb_down -13

professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why is cancer a big thing because its bad

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

thumb_up thumb_down

y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +8

no.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops