What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

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What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Arms and legs, NOT GET IN MY MINIVAN!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A house comes around the corner.

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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