Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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What do you call a black man forcing two young girls into his car with a gun? A Police Officer.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Your mom

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

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What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

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Why does the party start when Kesha walks in? Well, it's Kesha's party and it would be rude to be in her house having a party when she wasn't there.

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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