What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

There once was a little girl called maddie who had a very earisponaceable daddy, she was taken from her bed and now she is dead and was raped by a Portuguese tranny

roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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