Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

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if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

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Wanna hear another joke? Wes Trillows penis!!!

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One, two, three, four and five

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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