Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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You and your parents are going to die today

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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A man walks into an anti Joke.

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What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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What's green and blue? yellow

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Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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