A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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What word rhymes with orange? -Adult onset diabetes

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Why didn't Timmy have a girlfriend ??? Because he's a Fruit bowl !

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hot diggity dog

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

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Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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Your mom is so old she died

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A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

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0 + 0 = 0

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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Whats 0+0 0

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Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and chickens are from a different phylum, they are genetically incompatible.

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2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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