How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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shea kisses a girl

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Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

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What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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What did Santa say to his elf? Nothing. Santa isn't real. Elves aren't either for that matter.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

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chuck norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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