dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didn't she get back on the swing? cause she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her up? Cause she had no friends. Why did she stay their all night? cause she had no family.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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Muslim athletes.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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Many people of many races do many things every day.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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