why do black people have dark skin? because they were born that way

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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What happened to the disabled man who went to Disneyland? He had a great time.

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Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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CAVE JOHNSON.

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How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

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You have cancer

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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