If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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hi

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what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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