Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Caroline Kelly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? Because that would be assault, and not only assault but aggravated assault, since you are using a weapon to do it. Plus, the lawyer would have an advantage over you in court during the trial, due to having a law degree.

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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