Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

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A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Q. If your rowing a canoe up a tree, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A. None because snakes don't have armpits.

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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want to no whats funny what your mom

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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who just made fun of katie matt

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I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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anus soup

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Women's rights

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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