Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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Obama.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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what's faster than a snail? Usain Bolt

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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ey can i pick your scabs plzz

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Why didn't the Country club waiter enjoy iced tea? He's simply always had a preference for warm beverages. He assumes this goes back to his infant days when his mother would massage his belly with warm porridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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