what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

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whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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