- Anti Joke

your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

So did you hear what happened to the deaf guy? He didn't either

Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

Lebron Traveled

Jesus the comedy skits: 1. Jesus just hanging around on a sunny day getting a bit philosophical... Jesus hanging on the cross screaming towards the sky: "FATHER WHYY!?" God: Giant thunderbolt across the sky as a giant storm begins, it rains whirlwinds etc supposedly worst storm since Noah`s ark according to The History Network Wet,cold Jesus with ringing ears: Gurgle spits ... WTF kinda answer is that? Could you not just have said because I work in mysterious ways or something equally stupid? TRUE fact: "then the lordeth sent forth a hailstorm of epic propotions in order to silence all of his insolent children, this was before the burning ashes and the sharp nails of course" -History channel 2. Jesus The wiseguy eh? Jesus being wise: "Only he that hates his mother and father can become my a student of mine" "And as thus God commanded that a single spiky cross with his son`s measurements where made, when Peter asked oh why lordy lordeth? God responded: Because of sin" and all was good" "Then Peter asked Goddeth, oh lawdy lawd, what is sin? God replied: Something original now shaddap!, and all was good?" 3. Brokeback Jesus fact: The bible does not use the word Donkey. "Jesus, why doest thou enter thy neigbors home and ride upon his large ass?" Jesus the psychic: "I shallt just ride upon his ass for a few hours, then God shall take ride his ass back", Ugh, I just got the feeling this is going to sound total Ass in the future... Who is quoting us by the way? -History channel. 4. Jesus the: Dumbass moments extended "Then Jesus touched upon the fig tree that denied him figs that WINTER, later the fig tree was dead for its lazyness" (real if not correctly quoted Jesus fact Kay?) Fact: Fig trees dont exactly look alive during winters, besides no trees give fruit during winter. "Then Jesus proceeded to demand eggs from a rooster, which he killed for the roosters lazyness" "Then Jesus proceeded to milk a bull and..." 5. Real story that does not quite make sense to me. Some blind guy was possessed by Legion, when they (WE ARE LEGION aka bunch of demons) saw Jesus they begged him not to kill them, as they would face God`s wrath. Jesus seemingly spared their life by putting Legion`s into several pigs... Which ran off and drowned themselves in the nearby river. ...Why did they suicide? Was it so humiliating going from a blind old man, towards pigs that they literally drowned themselves (one of the more painful deaths there are) and then probably faced da lawds wrath anyways?

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? Dead.

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

Why does the St. Johns River flow north? Because Georgia Sucks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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