Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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alex is cool

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

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three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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96

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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