How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

My dad beats my mom At checkers

When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

What's yellow and dangerous? China.

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

A sober Amy Winehouse

What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

Ahmed walks into Abbar.

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

Whose your daddy? Not me

What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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