what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

,Do you know what hapened to the janitor who cleaned the school halls? He finished the job, got paid a reasonable amount and went home to his average family.

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

What rhymes with milk...milf

Why did the black man pick up a bucket of fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

A man, John, is talking amongst a group of friends. He tells a racist joke and sees that one of his colored friends, Mark, is laughing at his joke, but John can tell that Mark's offended. John later apologizes to his friend because that is the right thing to do.

Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

your social life.

A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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