Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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A guy asks someone's name. The other guy answer that his name is Steeve.

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Why did the man fall down? He got shot

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

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A Jew and a Nazi encountered each other on the street. They exchanged pleasant greetings and carried on in their desired directions.

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For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

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wanna no wats not funny........ aids

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I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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