Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

Q: What do you call 10 black people in the ocean? A: A family having a good time on an exciting scuba diving tour.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

what do u call a hobo name Max Max

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

What do u call a Mexican on the moon? An astronaut. What do u call all the Mexicans on the moon? Problem solved!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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