What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

what happend when a blind guy tried to save a guy from a fire big mistake they both died

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

I'm Batman.

Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because it tastes good.

Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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