Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops