A russian gives away vodka.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I am on a escalator.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Mr. Burns sex scandal.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +24

http://anti-joke.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops