How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Ms. Smoot's class

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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