Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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Why didn't the black man pay child support? He had no children.

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Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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What's better than sex? Nothing

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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Do you know what they say? Words

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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