Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

knock, knock. come in.

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

Hey, we're both lawyers.

What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

A woman should not be in the kitchen.

Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...