There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

Are you a human?

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

Alex Eggbert

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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