A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

haha, you're an orphan

Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

Ms. Smoot's class

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

12

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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