What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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why did i fall? i got pushed!

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Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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Your time.

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Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

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what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

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What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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guess what chicken butt

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Thanks

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Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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why was Austin sad cause his dick fell off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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