Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

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what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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Ms. Smoot's class

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Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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marshal sterio had sex

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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