what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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A black guy with his family.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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Nothing yet CC

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Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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69

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Why did Adele suck the doctors dick? LOL, did you think the doctor really got her to open her mouth all the time so he could "look at her sick throat"

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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