Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

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you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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¿melano?

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I'm gay. No homo.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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asparagus

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Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

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If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

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Hi my name is Jim

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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