Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

haha, you're an orphan

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

Two women were sitting quietly.

marshal sterio had sex

Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

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Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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