What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

The penn state football administration

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

Six million.

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

whats stupid and gay all of my friends

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

Wats worse than bitting into apple and finding a worm Bitting into an apple and finding an alligator

GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...