Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

Jared Gough is a slut

A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

What's worst than failing your test? AIDS

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

Haikus can be fun But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

2 women were sitting quietly

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

Women are definitely a full time job.. You should be paid to have them......

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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