Yo momma so stupid that she went to get a college degree from a community college and along with her education now has a greater opportunity to earn money with that knowledge.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

thumb_up thumb_down +61

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

thumb_up thumb_down +53

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

24!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops