why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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a guy walks into a bar the barman says "what'll it be?"

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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*knock knock "there's a door bell"

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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knock knock whos there? how should I know?

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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