What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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What's funnier than poop? More poop

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

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What did the Ocean say to the Sky? Nothing, it just waved.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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minecraft

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Why is the women in the street selling her body for money? because she has 3 kids and a father with cancer.

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What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

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whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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Blarg

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So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops