How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hey bill!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you mix tea and sugar? sweet tea...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

aggie wilkinson, i WOULD!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a homeless person with a dog? An animal lover.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I went to visit my friend last week (not a guy, guys as friends? Thats just gay, I mean you fuck all of your friends right?) And she was really happy and stuff right? I mean REALLY happy, and the poor thing was depressed for like 8-9 months or something. So I was like: ARE YOU HIGH RIGHT NOW? >:( She said: YEAH I AM HIGH ON LIFE! I looked down at the ground, it contained a full box full of syringes and needles! So I grabbed the whole thing and threw them out! So then I learned what Insulin was anyways. Ps: Depressed, pregnant... Not sure anymore, it was like two weeks ago or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

there is no such thing as a dumb blonde. cant you tell? I'm a blonde... skipping school.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why don't you ask him, o wait he's a chicken, you cant ask him. he is incapeable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

thumb_up thumb_down -19

knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I enjoy owboy butt sex with big black men please call me at 9528579236

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops