F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

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A man walks into a park and presents candy to children. They request more candy and thus are laureded into his van. They are raped murdered and never seen again.

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What did one dolphin say to the other? Nothing. It was dead.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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Who is pack bombs and has gum cancer? • Theo Kingdom

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If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

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Why was the man tired at his soccer game? Because he did not sleep well the night before

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What is worse than the Holocost? Keeping the Jews alive.

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Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except the duck.

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Q: How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I heard this joke before but I can't remember

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What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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wow garlic, yum

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What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a n**ga!

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why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

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Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

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whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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