How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

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When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

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Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

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What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

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Guy walks into a bar and half his head is an orange. Barman: What can i get.. holy shit half your head is an orange!! How did that happen?? Guy: Magic Lamp, rubbed it, three wishes etc etc. Barman: What in the bejesus were your three wishes, half your head is an orange. Guy: First Wish – I wished for every woman in the world to love me. Barman: Right, that is ok. What was your second wish? Guy: Second Wish – I wished that I was a billionaire. Barman: What in the hell was your third wish half your head is a frickin orange? Guy: It was a silly wish. I dot wanna say: Barman: Go on tell me, I’ll give you a drink. Guy: OK well for my third wish I wished that half my head was an orange.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

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1unno;njfjk

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A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

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Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

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A baseball player hits a home run and wins the game for his team, when he arrives back home expecting to see his mother and father, he remembers they both died in a car crash several years ago.

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Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 new what 6 and 9 were doing.....

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Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

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Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

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Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q; What do you call a dog? A; A dog.

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How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

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Obama is a good president.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops