why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

what's the best part about twenty three year olds? There is twenty of them

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boyscouts come back from camp.

Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Once cooked to a golden brown they are removed for human consumption.

what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

What's red, black, and blue all over? A canvas with red, black, and blue paint.

Whats worse than hearing a terrible trombone player? The screams of the maimed and dying.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because dead people cannot go to balls.

What did a child without arms and legs get for Christmas present. Cancer.

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen. You are going to go to jail.

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poetry

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

Knock knock *silence* Knock knock *silence* KNOCK KNOCK! Hey! Can't you read the sign?! It's says "Do Not Disturb!"

:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

A man walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken I don't see anything funny about this at all. -Tag

How come fat people drive cars? It takes to long to ride a bike to McDonalds

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...