why did everyone in the swimming pool move away from the woman... because she had a miscarriage

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

Why Did The Monkey Fall Out Of The Tree? Because It Was Dead

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poetry

There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

haikus are easy but sometimes they make no sense refrigerator

Roses are red and blue Violets are red and blue Those 3D glasses really suck.

8============D PEN1S

A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

Who is pack bombs and has gum cancer? • Theo Kingdom

What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey wahy did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? because it had no arms why did the little girl fall off her bike? she got hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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