Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poetry

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

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Q: How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I heard this joke before but I can't remember

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Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

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josh roberts goes into churches and forces them to listen and go by his religious opinion until they cry

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knock knock. whos there? ............... stupid kids

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What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

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if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

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There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

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What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

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Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

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Whats worse than hearing a terrible trombone player? The screams of the maimed and dying.

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Knock knock *silence* Knock knock *silence* KNOCK KNOCK! Hey! Can't you read the sign?! It's says "Do Not Disturb!"

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen. You are going to go to jail.

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Junior's love life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

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Obama is a good president.

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A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

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A priest walks into a day care center. He calmly blesses all of the surrounding children a leaves.

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Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

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Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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