How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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like most people my age. im 27

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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