Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

thumb_up thumb_down -22

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

12/23/2012

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Maths.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops