what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

What do short Mexicans do after a hot shower? Dry off with a towel like everyone else,

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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