A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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