An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

Your're racist.

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

Why did the feminist complain? that's what they do

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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