Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

Why did the old man die? He was old.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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