A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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