Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

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What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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My cat just died.

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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