Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

Top 10 Signs You Might Be Lonely and in Need of a Friend 10. Your closest friend has a skull tattooed on his knuckles and goes by the nickname bruiser. 9. You are becoming a little too fond of chess and pocket protectors. 8. You parents complain that your friends are a "Pack of wild chickens"-and it's not a figure of speech. 7. You follow your mailman around in hopes of a good conversation. 6. A cop pulls you over for speeding, and you add him to your Chistmas card list. 5. Your equation for a snappy party = TV remote + bean dip. 4. You forward e-mail jokes to yourself regularly. 3. You six best friends are Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Rachel. 2. You've named all of your roaches. 1. Phone solicitors hang up on you!

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...