The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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