roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

thumb_up thumb_down -20

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo momma so ugly that she is unpleasant to look at

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops