What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

pull my finger (farts)

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

my egg roll

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...