Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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