Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -25

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

thumb_up thumb_down -25

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q:Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: he isn't because 6 and 7 are both concepts that cannot have fear like a living being

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A Jew walks into Macy's

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops