What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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I want seaman but sex with interracial men body builders. Please call me - 843-813-2788

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Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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