What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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