How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

sweating like antoni with a girl

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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