What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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I don't get it

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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