How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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