What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

8================D-------- (.Y.)

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...