Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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penis

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

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Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

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"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

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Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops