Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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A shark ate your mom

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What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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