what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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I'm Polish.

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops