How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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