In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -51

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's white and horny? A unicorn

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops