why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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