A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

What comes after Friday? A ?.

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...