Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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Looks like you are having a TUFF time recovering from the game.....lol.....

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whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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A black man walks into a movie theatre... And pay for a ticket that would grant him access to watch the verity Of movies available to watch that month of screening. He picks the warhorse which was critically acclaimed by many respected critics. He watched and observed the positive and negative points of the the film. When it ended he took a long a ride home on the number 76 bus to ibswitch road where he lived during that time, and wrote about his opionion on the movie and how he thought the movie could be improved. He done this same routen for another six months, every saturday, until he died of aids shorty after a homosexual fling.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grasp or throw anything, so the point is moot unless they evolve thumbs for the sole purpose of chucking wood.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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A penguin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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