Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

1+2 = 6

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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