What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

eat a hot dog

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom showed up at my house last night. I kindly greeted her and asked if I could help her with anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops