How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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