What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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Jack Stevens

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Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

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Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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