What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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why was the little girl crying? she just watched her whole family get murdered.

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why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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whats the difference between a dead body and a car with doors that open in a diagnal manner one was never alive to begin with

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

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Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

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what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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cool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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