What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

What is black and has no education A tire.

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

homosexual rights to marriage

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

a blind man walks into a wall

What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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