Knock Knock! Who's there?! Michelle Bachman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the b\Batmobile? A: "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

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Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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