Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

Your mom is so old she died

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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