What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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cory is gay

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theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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cool

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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