What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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