What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

roak

How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

Women's rights.

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

AIDS

What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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