Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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Q:How many pancakes can you fit on top of as doghouse? A:Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.....

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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