The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Jay-Z

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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A blind man walks into a library.

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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