How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

Q: are you gay? A: maybe

Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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