What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Burp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops