Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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Fat? Jesse Z

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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miha kako si?

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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womens rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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