What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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