An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

A seal walks into a club.

America

What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

why did you poop because you are a poop

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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