Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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You're a big fat monkey.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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