There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

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whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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whats the difference between a dead body and a car with doors that open in a diagnal manner one was never alive to begin with

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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The Qur'an

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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