Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

cool

What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

american idol

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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